Who Do I Root For?

This weekend is the Class A Football Championship Game in Billings as the undefeated Billings Central Rams do battle against the Miles City Cowboys.  I have a bit of a dilemma...my stepson is a student at Billings Central and I am a graduate of Custer County District High School in Miles City.  So who do I root for? 

GO COWBOYS! 

I don't care where you live, you will always root for your High School team.  I have an added incentive this year because my best friend's son is the kicker for the Cowboys and the boy is like a nephew to me.  I'm sure Central will be favored to win.  They've already beat the Cowboys once this year.  The Rams have a great team and would be well deserving champions and I certainly won't be disappointed if they win.  In any event, it should be a great game between two tough football teams, with the Stanton brothers at the helm of both teams.  All I know is I will be attending the game in my blue and gold undies.

Back on the Blog!

Greetings one and all.  I haven't blogged for a while and I'm feelin' the itch!  Actually I haven't done much because I've had a bad back for the past few weeks.  It was hell!  I had no control over my right leg and I was walking like the "silly walk sketch" from Monty Python's Flying Circus.  Luckily I had an epidural injection that seems to be working.  I am no longer walking funny which is a plus.  When you start walking funny, people react in strange ways.  Some feel sorry for you.  Some wonder what is wrong with you.  In my case women and small children run screaming in the opposite direction.  Maybe I was walking a little TOO funny!

I need to mention the Oakland Raiders STUNNING defeat of the Denver Broncos last Sunday.  I've been a Raiders fan since I was an elementary school student in Bakersfield, California.  Our school team was the Raiders and I guess that's when I jumped on the bandwagon.  Anyway...holy crap!  59-14?  Did I read that correctly?  I wonder what the bronco players thought when they looked up and saw their fans evacuating the stadium in droves!  I'm sure the Raiders won't score 59 points for the rest of the season, but it was satisfying to watch the beat down.  The Broncos have officially become a rented mule!

Medical Update

I know you are all dying to know which of my body parts has decided to go out on me.  It's my back this time.  I'm limping around like a man twice my age...and yes I mean like a 104 year old.  The only difference between me and a 104 year old is I am not as sharp mentally.  Anyway, I have a slipped disc which is causing me untold amounts of pain.  You know that little chart in the doctor's office that defines pain?  The one where it goes from a yellow smiley face to a red face that looks like it might explode.  Well I look just like the exploding head.  I could go off at any moment.  BOOM!  I guess they are going to give me a shot in the back that will make me feel like I'm 25 again.  I can hardly wait to find out which part is going to go bad next.  I'll bet my warranty has run out too.

By the way Jack had a great birthday yesterday.  I bought him a new flying squirrel toy and he went nuts!  He also had ice cream.  It doesn't suck to be him.

It's Jack's Birthday!

Happy Birthday to my beautiful Golden Retriever Jack.  He is quite simply my best buddy in the whole world.  Oh sure he ignores me when I call him to come in, and he often thinks that it is HE and not ME who is leader of the pack, but he loves me unconditionally and I am crazy about him.  I told my wife, when we were dating, that the only real criteria for her was that Jack had to like her and she had to like him.  She has learned to ignore the massive amounts of hair that we vacuum up weekly, and the giant dog poop in the back yard, and we are now one big happy family.  Jack even has learned to like his "step-puppies" JJ and Jewels.  Jack is 8 years old today and they say that is a doggie senior citizen.  I'm pretty sure that he will live to be 20.  Here's to another 12 years buddy.

Biggest Loser

It was an exciting episode of Biggest Loser last night!  By my count, we reached a new crying record.  I counted 64.3 crying incidents per hour...some of it full fledged sobbing.  There was also lots of yelling and grunting.  Why do I watch this every week?  Simple...it makes me feel skinny.  Period.  I'm going to have another Butterfinger before I go on the air today and I don't have to worry about a weigh in.

If there is another human soul who is actually taking the time to read this drivel...please let me know.  I'd hate to think I am pouring out my soul...especially about the Biggest Loser...and nobody is there.  That is exactly how people gain weight.  They blog and nobody reads.  Oh geez...I feel a crying jag coming on.

Crickets. 

I'm Falling Apart!!

Two years ago, when I turned 50, I was in the best shape of my life.  I was working out like a fiend.  I lifted weights and went to spinning classes.  I did the abs class after spinning, and sometimes, in the right light, I could actually see a six pack! I don't mind telling you I was BUFF!

Something dreadfully wrong has happened in the last two years.  Lately my body seems to be systematically revolting against me, one part at a time.  I can't read ANYTHING now without my glasses.  My knee, hip, and back are killing me.  I'm limping around like a man 30 years older.  IT SUCKS!  The constant pain is making it hard to enjoy the things I love...like fast food, Leave it to Beaver Marathons, old rock and roll, and puppies.  Seriously, when you get to the point where you can't enjoy puppies it might be time to pack it in.

After making a desperate plea to my orthopedic surgeon to get me in as soon as possible I was able to get an appointment tomorrow at 9AM.  I'm going to suggest they just take the whole leg and replace it with a wooden peg.  I've always wanted to walk around with a wooden leg while the parrot on my shoulder says embarrassing things to people on the street.  Perhaps my dream will come true.

All I know is this getting old crap isn't for sissies!

Raiders Win!!

Good Morning!

I didn't know what I was going to write about today, and then the Oakland Raiders gave me a great topic after they destroyed the Chargers yesterday, breaking San Diego's 13 game winning streak.  People often laugh at me when they find out I'm a Raiders fan.  I admit it has been tough the past few years, and I'm sure we're not out of the woods yet, but a win over the Chargers is HUGE!  Now if we can only beat the Donkey's...I mean Broncos...two games this year, it will be a successful year.

If you are reading this to find out what I did over the weekend...here it is in a nutshell...I DID NOTHING! What did you do?